Dreaming of the Slack Life as a Taxi Driver

Why not Join Us?

Ø  Experience the highs and lows of subservience to an ungrateful public who think they should be able to treat you like the crap you are because they are paying you and they are always right.

Ø   Learn people handling skills as you chase that runner down the street who then demands that you give them your cash rather than pay their fare (that’s when you can smack them).

Ø  Discover your domestic abilities as you clean vomit, urine, faeces and blood from the upholstery and then apologise to future passengers for the stagnant odours so kindly provided by the previous recalcitrant.

Ø  Learn flexible driving techniques as you swerve to duck spit, ciggy butts, bottles, rocks, kebabs, eggs and other projectiles hurled at you as you try to avoid abusive passengers.

Ø  Transport passengers high on life, drugs etc, that not even armed police want to deal with.

Ø  Experience the health benefits of sitting in a confined space for up to 12 hours.   Deep vein thrombosis can be fun especially as it kicks in when you are chasing those pesky fare evaders.

Ø  Learn to budget your life on less than the minimum wage.   If you can take $400.00 in a 12 hour night and then take all the costs and standard benefits other workers get your hourly rate works out at around $14.00 an hour (if you can take $400.00).   Then compete with 3^rd worlders who are prepared to work for even less.

Ø  Learn the futility of trying to find another job when you add Taxi Driver to your resume.   The HR girl immediately dumps your application in the rejected pile as she remembers the bad taxi ride she had as she drunkenly tried to get home the previous Saturday night.

Ø  Enjoy the peaceful life of solitude as you lose contact of family and friends as you are always working when they are out partying.   But then the money you save is phenomenal which it has to be when you earn $14.00 an hour.   Fun is so overrated anyway.

Think you got what it takes?    Call Swan Taxis on 9422 2222 and you could be hauling Taxi arse in two weeks.   C’mon, you can do it.                  Hal Yeah…J